There has been a rumor circulating around the world for some time now that I have some kind of monkey paw instead of a human hand. I would like to once and for all make an official statement. I do not have a monkey paw. It is just a very very hairy human hand.

I think that many people believed it was a monkey paw due to the fact that aside from being so incredibly hairy it also moves quicker than most other human hands do. I dont know how or why it does this, it just does. It may or may not have something to do with my monkey ancestory, but let me repeat... It is a human hand.

Recently this rumor caused some trouble in the Czeck republic. A major newspaper there heard about thís so called monkey paw and printed a story about me and my non human hand in their newspaper. Many people came to see the show, including a large number of people with prothstetic limbs. When they saw that my hand was actually somewhat normal except for the large amount of hair, some of them became quite upset. They wanted to see a man with a monkey paw play guitar.

The next day the newspaper recieved many letters complaining that the public had been decieved and they wanted an explanation.

The newspaper tracked down my Czeck booking agent, Stephan, and called for a press conference. Stephan had never done a press conference before in his life, and he told me how nervous he was as he walked up to the microphones. Then on live TV and radio he apologizid to the Czeck Republic public for Bob Log III not having a monkey paw.

As of yet I dont know if the people of the czeck republic have accepted the apology. It is entirely possible that the next time I go to Prague might be chased through the main square by an angry mob who wants to beat me on the head with all their prostetic limbs because of the fact that I do not have a monkey paw. But I am not worried. Not at all. Because I know I can outrun anybody with my newly aquired quicker than human monkey legs. They will never catch me.

Bob Log